Ep. 5: Does God Speak through Dreams?

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Sometimes, a dream is just a dream. But this one was different.

…but there is a God in heaven who reveals mysteries. He has shown King Nebuchadnezzar what will happen in days to come. Your dream and the visions that passed through your mind as you were lying in bed are these: (Dan. 2:28 NIV)

I’ve always had dreams, but in most instances, I’d wake up with only vague recollections of what I had dreamt about.

However, a handful of dreams I’ve had stand out from the rest. You know how some people dream in black and white and others dream in color? My dreams had always been in color, but the outstanding dreams were almost like they were in high-definition, with a crisp clarity and vivid details that I’d remember years later.

One of these dreams occurred shortly after my prayer of surrender to God. In it, I met a young Asian woman with a friendly smile, black hair in a ponytail, and a black backpack slung over a puffy pink jacket.

She didn’t say or do anything but stand there. The dream only lasted a few seconds, yet the imagery was seared into my mind.

I didn’t know what to make of it. Who was this girl? Why did I notice the pink jacket, black backpack, and ponytail? A fleeting thought came that perhaps this is the girl I would someday meet and marry, but hadn’t I just told God that I wouldn’t pursue anyone anymore? I dismissed the dream as being nothing more than another bit of nonsense spewed up by my subconscious, dragging it to my mental trash bin.

Around that time, I had taken a year off from design school to focus on work, and by the time I jumped back into the program, many of my former classmates had already graduated, so I was now in the class that had been a year behind me.

On the first night of one class, I was sitting in the back row, chatting with a classmate, when I caught a glimpse of two Asian women entering the room. I was instantly attracted to one of them, but since I had given up on trying to meet anyone, I didn’t give it any further thought. Besides, even if I wanted to pursue her, I probably wouldn’t stand a chance.

She was cute. She had a pretty smile. She looked like she was out of my league, and I assumed that she was already with someone.

I tried to ignore her for a week or two– until it hit me that this girl, who was Asian and wore her long, black hair in a ponytail, always came to class with a black backpack slung over her puffy, pink jacket.

Just like the girl I had dreamt about several months earlier.

I would have done a spit-take, had I been drinking milk and lived in a sitcom. Why was this happening? Why, after I told God that I’d accept being single forever if that were His will for me, did I get a crazy dream and actually meet a girl whom I was undeniably attracted to and perfectly matched the description in that dream?

Perhaps the dream was to show me that it wasn’t God’s will for me to remain single? Or maybe this was a test, to see if I meant what I said in my prayer.

I wasn’t even sure if God spoke through dreams, as I hadn’t read the Bible yet at the time. If I had, I would have known about Old Testament examples such as Jacob, who received a promise from God in a dream (Gen. 28:10-17). His son, Joseph, received prophetic dreams that stirred jealousy and resentment among his brothers (Gen. 37:1-11); when Joseph was later imprisoned in Egypt, he interpreted dreams for the Pharaoh (Gen. 41:17-36). Daniel interpreted dreams for the king of Babylon when no one else could (Dan. 2:24-45; 4:1-37). God came to King Solomon in a dream and said, “Ask for whatever you want me to give you,” to which Solomon requested wisdom (1 Kgs. 3:5-9).

In the New Testament, an angel of the Lord appeared in a dream to Joseph, who had considered divorcing his scandalously pregnant teenage fiancée, Mary, and said, “Do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit” (Matt. 1:18-20). After Jesus was born, Joseph was warned in another dream to take Mary and the child to Egypt to escape from the murderous King Herod (Matt. 2:13), and once the danger had passed, God again spoke to Joseph in a dream, telling him to return to Israel (vv. 19-20). When the adult Jesus was on trial by Pontius Pilate, Pilate’s wife knew that Jesus was innocent of the charges leveled against him, based on a disturbing dream she had (Matt. 27:19). And after Jesus ascended into heaven and sent the Holy Spirit to His followers, Peter quoted from the book of Joel, which says that in the last days, God would pour out His Spirit on all people, “young men will see visions,” and “old men will dream dreams” (Acts 2:17; Joel 2:28).

There are other examples of God speaking through dreams in the Scriptures, but since I wasn’t familiar enough with the Bible to know any of them, getting dreams like this was an alien experience to me. I wasn’t sure what to make of it.

I tried to find out more about this girl with the ponytail, backpack, and pink jacket. Her name was Soo, and she had come from South Korea, as did her friend, who happened to be her roommate. I saw a guy who appeared to be her roommate’s significant other greet them after class, but I didn’t see any guys looking friendly with Soo. Didn’t notice any sparkles on her left hand, either.

Maybe there was hope for me.

A classmate of ours asked if we could all start a student email list so that we could contact one another. Perfect– now I had Soo’s email. One night, Soo asked the instructor where she could buy a specific art supply item near her home. “Where do you live?” asked the teacher.

“Glendale,” replied Soo.

I just happened to know of a good art supply shop in Glendale, so I decided to make a move. I emailed Soo, introduced myself as her classmate, and told her the name and address of the art store near her home in Glendale. She wrote me back to thank me, and said she’d thank me in person at the next class.

Things were looking up.

Our next class rolled around. I waited in nervous anticipation for Soo to come up to me, but to my dismay, she ignored me for most of the class. Anticipation faded into disappointment as the class ended. I packed my bags and started heading for the door when I saw Soo beeline towards me. She asked if I was Stephen, the one who had emailed her about the art supply store. I told her I was, and the next thing I knew, I had knocked over a drink and spilled it all over the table.

Slick move, Mack.

She thanked me for the information and told me that it wasn’t until the end of class that she figured out which one of her classmates Stephen was. It was a pleasant but non-eventful encounter. No sparks flew, but at least we had met in person.

Over the next several weeks, I’d try to make small talk with Soo, but it never got very far. She’d smile politely and say a word or two, but that was it. I was losing heart. Maybe this was just a test, and God wanted to see how sincere I was when I surrendered to His will.

I thought about giving up again when a second dream grabbed my attention: In this one, I was sitting in the office of the taekwondo studio I trained at, and my instructor slid a file folder across his desk, towards me. I opened the dossier and found a photograph of Soo, headshot style, wearing a sweater vest with a very specific color and texture to it. I could even see the fibers of its fabric.

Imagine my surprise when, the very next day, Soo walked into class wearing that very same sweater vest– same color, same texture, same fabric. Another crazy dream come true?

This was the encouragement I needed to press on.

My final project for the design program was a television commercial I was producing for my taekwondo studio. I wanted to insert some Korean words in the background, but since I don’t speak Korean, I thought it’d be the perfect excuse to ask Soo to help me. I emailed her, told her about the project, and asked if she’d be interested in a small freelance job.

She agreed to help. As we worked on this project, we emailed each other more frequently, but the conversation never veered into any territory other than the project.

We neared the end of the design program in summer of 2000. I emailed her and asked what her plans were after graduation. She told me she was going back home to South Korea, but was applying for a practical training visa to get a few months of experience stateside first. I wished her luck and asked about her final project.

She didn’t reply.

A week went by. Then another.

Nothing.

Dejection sank me. Why, after I had already made peace with the idea of never pursuing another relationship again, did I have to go through such a tremendous disappointment? Was God really testing me? Why would He do that, and why would He do that to someone like me? I wasn’t even committed to Him. Who was I to think that I’d get dreams from God– about a girlfriend, no less? The premise alone sounds cheesy: “Meeting the girl of my dreams.”

I felt pretty lame for believing what I did.

And what did I believe, anyway? I questioned it all. Why was I praying to the God of the Jews and Christians when there were other gods being worshiped around the world? There was a whole pantheon of Chinese deities, and since I would forever be labeled Chinese (even though I’m about as Chinese as Orange Chicken, my ancestors having left the mainland six generations ago), why not give them a try? Or, why worship a deity at all? I was a capable human being, I told myself. I could do anything and excel at it, if I wanted to.

I decided that I didn’t need God.

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